Tuesday, September 23, 2014

Will Masturbation Kill Your Gainz?

Masturbation has been known to cause blindness, hairy palms, and warts, but inquiring minds want to know if spanking the monkey will make you lose your muscular gains. There have been numerous studies on the subject, but to this date, there is no concrete evidence supporting the theory that firing off a few knuckle children will make you lose muscle. I am of the belief that beating your meat will not cause muscle tissue to break down.



Firstly, you cannot expect to lose your gainz overnight. Just like you won't get jacked after one day at the gym, you cannot expect to become a skeleton after jacking one time. Any theory that states this is preposterous. You would probably have to make a habit out of beating your meat dozens of times a day to see any visible changes (aside from a possible and small increase of forearm mass) that directly correlate to masturbation.

Secondly, let's break down the calories. Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrell were right: "Ain't Nothing Like the Real Thing", since a half-hour of real sex would burn about a hundred or so calories on average. This is only half as many calories as one could expect jogging for the same duration of time. Now, if you are only burning around a hundred calories with all of the muscle groups that you are recruiting (especially if you're doing it correctly like the Admiral does), then you cannot expect to burn enough to go into a caloric deficit going solo.

Like many things in life, physiques are not built or destroyed in a vacuum. Masturbation alone will not effect your physique that much; it would likely be habits revolving around masturbation that would effect your gainz. For instance, if you stay up late to do the deed, you might not be getting adequate rest for your body to recover and grow. If you masturbate so much that you don't eat enough, or if it cuts into time that you should be getting real exercise hitting the gym, then your body isn't getting what it needs to grow (and you may want to seek help). The same things can apply to real sex too though, like the guy that spends all of his nights drinking in clubs to get that tang. The sex itself is not what is doing damage, but the habits around it.

Personally speaking, masturbation does not completely sap me of energy, but it would cause me to waste a lot of time trying to fire one off. This is time better spent exercising, or working on developing entrepreneurial skills. Real sex, on the other hand, is often invigorating. This is probably psychological in my case, since a conquest makes me want to conquer more, leapfrogging from victory to victory.

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